He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize