Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
