Need sex. Gaining weight.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
