dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
