Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize