Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
