Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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