it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
either way he was missing a nipple.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
