oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
