I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
so much tequila, so little girl.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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