Do vagina's smell?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
