I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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