my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Your cock deserves a montage
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
