I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
