I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize