well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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