i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
