You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
