I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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