I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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