you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize