He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize