he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
