I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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