I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize