SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
