i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
