is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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