i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
