that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Vodka?
Forever.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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