ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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