Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
