i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
We had sex on a dog bed..
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
