Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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