my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
