So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
