If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize