he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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