playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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