he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
