you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I think a kid would responsible me up
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
