I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
