Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
