We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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