you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I came so hard my ears popped.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
