I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
