Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
