Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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