there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
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