ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
