He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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