That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
