My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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